Technical Knock Out

He's mine!

He’s mine!

It’s Sunday evening and I can hear the neighbours going at it hammer and tongs downstairs. How utterly delightful! But I guess I could use it as a semi-appropriate soundtrack to tonight’s blog post as I regale you with my adventures from the past few days. Otherwise I could always jam my aurally abused earholes with the earplugs I bought myself today – seriously, I must be psychic. First, a return to the speed dating frenzy from Thursday night. As per previous speed dating evenings there was lots of sparkling wine and lots of laughs, but only one guy in IT – hurrah! So the evening didn’t fall flat on its face. However, the same can’t be said for a couple of the lovely ladies who were my opponents in vying for the attention of almost 10 gents. Virgin speed daters, these two fine lasses introduced themselves to me as “good friends”. But by the end of the night they were arch enemies, having drunkenly duked it out over a couple of the guys who they’d known for all of eight minutes.

Hahah! Nope, he's MINE!!!

Hahah! Nope, he’s MINE!!!

I escaped the scene of the carnage delighting in the knowledge that my “good friend” is over in Jordan right now, so there was no chance I’d have to worry about starting my own Female Fight Club. Tyler Durden can stay tucked away for another tempestuous Thursday night! But if you could fight anyone, who would you fight? Don’t say William Shatner! The thrills and spills of Thursday night left the weekend for getting art and about. After a familial brunch on Saturday where I told the tale of my novel-to-be for the ten-billionth time, it was off to Leichhardt to scope the size of the space for the upcoming art exhibition. That in turn led to me getting trussed up like this:

Big Foot the Clown

Big Foot the Clown

And learning the ins and outs of how to fibreglass a blue whale’s heart – the key’s in the dabbing; how to stop your safety goggles from fogging up – take them off; and what to do in an emergency situation when there’s no Malbec to hand – Merlot’s a decent alternative (and it works nicely with blue cheese). I also got my elbows out today and fought the crowds at the State Library on the final day of their World Press Photo exhibition. Some of the photos looked just like Fight Club, only for real. It’s a crazy, crazy world we live in, alright, so I’m going to take a moment now to count my blessings. And pop in my earplugs. Ahh, bliss!